This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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