i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
So much rum. So many feels.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
