I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
