Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize