they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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