My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
