gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Randomize
