Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize