It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Randomize