I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
false alarm. still invincible.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
my liver is dry heaving
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
