he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
