Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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