I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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