New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
