I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
