just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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