You can't special order awesome
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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