eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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