So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
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