two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
