ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
