Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
