I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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