if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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