totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
So much rum. So many feels.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I came so hard my ears popped.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
