What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
