Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize
