I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
