I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize