i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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