Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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