we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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