Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
