I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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