We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Randomize
