wat bout pragnant strippers??
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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