we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize