sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
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