I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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