so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize