if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
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