Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
