drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
