Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
