Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
