ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize