Cold hands, warm shart.
I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i would punch a child for taco bell
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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