weddingsv make me drug and hornr
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
