There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
