you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
too bad you live with your parents still
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
