She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
